"Will I regret being here?"

I offer this question upfront as one you might need by the time you are half way through one blog post. I hope you laugh, but suspect a large range of other emotions are also on offer including panic, shock and anxiety that Japan may confine the whole of the Western world to a padded cell after hearing me photograph a toilet.

Hi, my name is Elizabeth. Welcome to my life.

 

(If the pictures below look weird, do a tiny resize to your browser window. Something untoward has happened to my set-up...) 


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"I erased him from my world," the girl sat with her friends in a restaurant, discussing a failed date with one of her housemates. The outing in question was with a guy named Yuudai who had the tenacity of wet spaghetti and wanted a girlfriend who would do everything for him, down to putting on his socks. I knew these details because I had watched the entire proceedings unfold the week before.

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My head gets examined

Even with earplugs, the noise was loud.

Click. Whir. Tic tic tic. Klonk.

I stared up at the plastic contraption holding my head in place and thought: How does anyone have sex in here?

Bobbing up and down

Nestled amongst the limestone protrusions in northern Vietnam's Halong Bay are people living in floating houses. 

Visiting hours for the deceased

On reflection, not stuffing the Queen Mother was a missed opportunity.

Water Puppetry

A traditional Vietnamese art is to combine the movies 'Psycho' and 'Child's Play' and produce a show known as ... water puppetry.  

Molesting healings

It wasn't until I was face down on the table having my bare buttocks spanked, that I wondered if my request for a head and shoulder massage had been misunderstood.

Immaculate flying

Conversing in Japanese is like being a dog.



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No clothes beyond this point

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Braids for white kids

10 things you didn't know about getting your hair braided (and which you might not get told since the hair salon is used to dealing with people who know better).

 


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