Things that go 'meow' in the night


"Tallis! It's 2 am! I need to sleep!"

"... Meow."


Fine. I flick the light on and look around for the wicked feline. Her voice comes from underneath me so, with a groan, I tilt myself off my mattress to look under the bed. No cat. Has she got caught up in the suitcases? I push them around a bit. Still no cat. Huh.



The noise comes from directly underneath me and ... in fact ... I can feel her.

She's in the box spring.


"Oh you are totally on your own."

The light goes out.


If you could see that I'm the one who understands you ....

"Ummmhuu," I glance bleary eyed at the radio only to be headbutted by a furry mallet.


"Oh you escaped, I see?"


"... that was a 'fuck you', wasn't it?"